WHY LOOKS REALLY DO MATTER.

i think i just went sterile.  :(

yes they do. looks do matter. before you say no and x the screen...don't. i'll tell you the secret of why here in a bit.

before i get the train out of the station on this one, i just hope everyone will read this with an open mind. i think it's a message that perhaps we can all take from. very true that there are more than good intentions present here...just so you know. besides, we all know that good intentions end there; intentions. it's what you do that counts. so that'll come in later. no worries, i have your best interests in mind.

first and foremost, i am fully aware that it's what's inside that really counts. the most important part of a person, the centerpiece of a girl or boy is their heart. all the great content of the character rests well in the chest and i'm sure everyone has heard me say this enough that i don't have to go into great detail on the topic. simple & sweet, you have to fall for someone's heart/feelings/emotions to truly fall in love with them. looks sneak into the picture through the window maybe...

so, it is either going to bother you or make you smile and feel confident knowing that looks do matter. you might feel indifferent, but few are on this gem of a subject. it's good that you have an opinion, because i want to help you develop it further. 

here is the number one reason why looks do matter. as much as we'd like to think we're not shallow and we don't care about that thing, sure we do. even we Christian-folk (sounds country or gangster depending on intonation) have to admit to ourselves that we are by nature shallow beings and as much as we'd love to say that looks do not matter at all...they do. if you are still denying the truth, scroll to the bottom of this note and tell me that you could undoubtedly fall in love with and without struggle look past the appearance of John Merrick (the "Elephant Man"...whom i draw a lot of inspiration from). in God's eyes, he is beautiful and perfect, but unfortunately for us, we are all too human to be so graceful in our perspectives. 

in our shallow eyes, everyone is not equally beautiful. sad to say, but painfully true. more importantly, i will say that in my heart, i do my best to love everyone the same...but even God knows i am not capable of that. i will try with all that i am, but it's not possible.

you are not, i am not and we are not God...which is probably a good thing, but that equals us being societal and judgemental by human nature. we can fight for our lives to imitate the heart of the one and only JC, but we'll never see things perfectly.

in a perfect world, everyone would be seen as equally pretty. society would never allow for that.

society is rough. it's a tough life. life is unfair. she's better looking. he has thicker hair. guys find her lips to be more sensuous. girls prefer him because of his heighth...blah blah blah, get over it. you and i, we have the cards that we were dealt. now what? 

take care of what you've been given. that's what. your body is a temple. looks do matter. maybe not in your mind, but here comes the killer. DO IT FOR YOUR SPOUSE/BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND. on your own will and aspirations alone, you should be motivated enough to appreciate and care for the collection of functioning muscles and bones you've been blessed with. if that's not enough, how about the person who agreed to spend their life with you...or who would like to spend their life with you? what about them? 

let's make it more concrete. make it more visceral. strip away all cosmetic and aesthetic views of the matter...is it fair to bring someone into your life, only to give up or become careless (in diet or exercise) to an extent that you're now shaving years off of your time here on earth that they were expecting to spend with you? i would guess most people are saying...well, that's not me. it's not hard to do. if you smoke (disgusting), drink regularly (beer gutters out there), eat fastfood (big mackers) on a consistent basis or just insist on throwing down sugary snacks until your esophagus hurts, then you're most likely going to either be a diabetic, get out of shape and perhaps dangerously obese (over 50% of the American population now) or just pick away at your planet-time bit by bit. that and your fruit of the looms won't look as ritzy as they once did. i won't get started on inexpensive underwear right now. on with the tasty stuff...

"it's my choice, i want to be fat". "i'll be fat if i want to". "i'm beautiful this way (345 lbs)". ok, go get diabetes. tell your hubby or wife that it's all about you now and your health isn't their business. good luck with that. you signed up for a lifetime on earth...don't you think it's fair that they get your best? wouldn't it be a delight to mall walk in stirrup pants (for you foxy ladies) and hold hands with your steed in his suspenders at the ripe age of 80? 

to lighten things up. isn't it just a great bonus when you are very physically attracted to your other half? without some sort of attraction, of course you wouldn't be together...and there is the great theory (which i believe) that when you really love someone, no matter what, they become more attractive in time. i like that. you have to like that, because well...gravity will grab us all and father time doesn't take naps. by traditional standards, we're all going to slip a bit, but by love's standards...it shall go the other way. how fabulous of the Big Man to give us that. i think of it like this...

i will be very old, wrinkly and ugly someday (some would say i have already fulfilled 2 of the 3). my wife (poor gal) will find that dreamy. lucky devil me! 

now all she has to do is put up with my lame jokes which i will tell probably every day until i die, my lack of senses (can cause problems), and my infinite pranks involving hot dogs (i am most excited about this)...and we'll be great! she'll be a real trooper, and she'll be beautiful...inside & out, bonus! definitely. enough about her. 

back to point A. i'm not saying go out and buy enough supplements to start your own GNC franchise until your six pack is bursting through your snowsuit and your arms are the size of Regina (the Canadian providence). i'm saying be good to you, for them. even if you're single and looking...why not start now? 

i hate working out. i'd be a liar if i said it made me happy. i hate it. i'd rather be writing or listening to music and playing with my dog. i'd rather be fishing (so says the iconic bumper sticker). i like to be creative and playful and relax. the gym is none of the three. the thing of it is though, is that i know that my sparkly little bride is out there somewhere and i'm going to give her the best version of me possible. it doesn't have to be a hawaiian tropic body oil contest where everyone counts the suns' glowy beams off of their muscle creases (would smell very coconut-y), but why not be healthy for them? why not be good to what you've been given.

your body was a gift. why don't you treat it better? don't we all take better care of the things given to us by the people we love? so what's the problem here?

the almighty battle against sugary sweets and couch surfing is a nasty one. the contrary though (eating right, working out, not binge drinking or smoking) pays off in spades times infinity. it's worth the challenge. if you're like...wow, i wish i could do that. you can. there's nothing wrong with not wanting to eat right and workout...but there is something wrong with trashing your temple when it's the only one you (and your better half...future or present) have got. 

i have a friend who got married. i won't say her name. this would come off mean, but it's not. it's educational. anyhoo...she married a very nice man. within a year after marriage, he went from being thin, fairly athletic and quite healthy to noticeably obese, quite lazy and undoubtedly less healthy. now i feel bad for her. what does she say? how do you approach that one? honey, you're getting fat? that's not nice, nor is it fair. but he did that selfishly in my opinion. she agreed to spend all of her days with him, and inside (health-wise) as well as outside, he's not even close to the same person anymore. i'm sad for her. of course she doesn't love him any less, but that's not fair to her in my opinion. i'm not being shallow right now. the truth hurts. i'm sure they'll be fine, but i wouldn't dream of doing that to my wife and if she did that to me, i'd be sad. i'll love her unconditionally, but i think the point is making itself clear here. for health reasons alone...this is simple math. 

the order of things...
1. you meet.
2. you are either initially physically attracted or not. (not in a lusty way you mongoloid)
a yes to #2 will only help your chances in getting to #3
3. you have or do not have chemistry.
4. if the answer is yes to 2 & 3 (you rascal!), then bonus!...let's go!
5. if the answer is no to 2 but yes to 3 and you fall for their internals and later find #2 then bonus!
6. hopefully everything works out, you take care of yourselves and grow in love 
7. you don't get in a fight regarding a spending limit on the value menu

rambling a bit, i'll try to wrap it up in saying looks aren't everything. anyone with common sense and a beating heart knows that. but, looks aren't nothing. looks are often times directly tied to your health and if you're not wanting to be physically attracted to someone on the outside, i couldn't imagine wanting to be with someone who is heading toward a shorter life span due to smoking or diabetes or something of the like. you have to have some kind of attraction. now, they owe it to you to take care of that feeling.

if you're someone reading this saying...wow, i have let go a bit...i see what's going on...then go for it. flex your muscles and make a positive change in your lifestyle. if you're someone reading this saying...what a shallow load of B.S., well it's not. fight the urge (it will make you stronger). put down that KFC (ouch) and get off your 6 hour tv-spree butt and take a walk. STOP DRINKING LIKE A TEENAGER ON THE WEEKENDS. 

grow up & take care of your body. you get one. it was a gift from God. don't worry about posing for the November Men's Health spread, just honor your blessing. 

and remember, if you have any intentions at all to marry, or if you already are...whats yours is hers/his and whats his/hers is yours...so be fair. give your best self & everyone will benefit in the long run. come to think of it, i bet Jesus loves a good marathon...heck, he might have had 18" inch biceps beneath the old robe.

now, don't be offended. think about the big picture...lasting forever and go hard. be brave about your lifestyle.

if you want to guarantee good looks, get this cut today.